Ok, so. I have a blog. Blog lists an e-mail address. So I get SEO spam requests. "Dear R, I read your blogpost <url> and I really think it would benefit from the link to my post <url>".
The post being peddled is inevitably just dull or bullshit. It's only purpose is to rack SEO for the main domain, that always sells some shitty service or another.
I usually ignore such e-mails…
…but this time the guy is really persistent. And is getting on my nerves.
So, I have an idea. And I want to know how bad it is.
I want to respond with:
thanks for reaching out. My going rate for a link placed on my blog is $500USD, and I get to decide where and how I place it, and in what content. It will be placed in a regular blogpost on the blog in question, reachable by search engines, of course.
I require payment of the half of the sum (non-refundable) before I prepare the specific placement offer, for you to accept or reject.
The offer is final, and once rejected, I understand you are no longer interested in placing a link on my blog. At that point the initial payment is considered payment for my time and expertise in preparing the offer.
If you accept the placement offer, I will put the link on-line within 10 work days, and I will expect payment at the latest a month from it went online.
Please be advised that any further communication that is not a clear rejection of this deal as outlined herein will accrue a $50 processing fee; any such further communication amounts to acceptance of these terms.
Please let me know if these conditions are acceptable. I am looking forward to doing business with you.
Now, the questions are:
1. is this clear enough such that when the guy is unhappy with my placement offer, he doesn't get to sue me for some bullshit;
I am happy to report that a solid 6 days later (for the first SEO scammer) and 5 days later (for the second one), neither decided to send me a reply nor even a reminder.
So I chalk this up as a success. Usually I get a reminder after 3-4 days, and I got *several* from the first aforementioned nincompoop across about a month and to two separate e-mail addresses.
I guess I need to write this up.
You know, on my blog.
That attracts SEO scammers.
The next stage would be talking to a lawyer and figuring out if I can make this into a shrink-wrap EULA type thing (these are, after all, valid and binding as many lawsuits have "proven").
"Sending me an e-mail suggesting to put a link of your choosing on my blog confirms you have read and accepted these terms. The processing fee for such a requests is $100, non-refundable."
That could have two outcomes:
1. I never et to see SEO scam spam ever again.
2. I get to invoice a SEO scammer one day.
A bunch of technomancers in the fediverse. This arcology is for all who wash up upon it's digital shore.